Living the Indie Life: 5 Things I’ve Learned the Hard Way

One of the most memorable years of my life are the years I spent living alone, independently. I had the whole time to discover myself, to finally connect with my being, my strengths, and my weaknesses, and to do all the things I want to do without any approval, only myself.

On the other hand, it was sad to be away from family, too, but it was all-happy at the same time. I answer only to myself, who by the way, is not too hard to please, if I may say. I’m not high-maintenance. Simple things drive me. 
I had the time to know more what I want in life, what I surely cry about, or what can hurt me. I protected myself at all times because no one can do it for me. Sure, there were a lot of lessons there, trial and errors, too. But with all the lessons I’ve learned, I learned it through the hardest way possible:
1. You are only accountable for yourself, so stop being a baby
My career was sure a whirlwind of an experience. It was ups and downs, and it had mostly downs at some point. I go home every night without someone to ask how my day went. It went on ticking me. It was a sad life, I may say so to myself way back.  
But a lot changed when I stopped being a baby and have been more responsible for my actions. It made me learn new things, be with a lot of different people from different creations of living, and it made me know what I was really capable of.

Stop treating it like the world owe you one because, in reality, the world doesn’t owe you anything. It is your duty to make your life wonderful and happy.

2. Value your relationships with people

Since you are living alone and you are far from the people whom you call family, it is best to value even the tiniest relationship with others. I was friends with my landlady, I talked to the security guard down my building, and I was in acquaintance with most of my neighbors. They kept me entertained and feeling alive at all times.

I’ve gone through a lot of phasing out with the people whom cannot serve me well anymore and vice versa. I cut-out toxic people in my life and I couldn’t be any happier to do so. I know they are also happy that I’m already out of their system because I can’t serve them better anymore.

3. Take care of your funds, with all your might

Woohoo! Millennials! Hahaha! Living solo is like living the dream. You are not to answer to anybody but yourself. So, you must, in all might, take care of your funds. I pay my own rent, utilities, food, and everything I need. Imagine how was that stressful for the most part? Haha! But, I’ve learned a lot about money how to actually keep up.

4. Heartbreaks everywhere

I swear that I won’t be in any relationship because I was not ‘that’ person who prefer it. But, that doesn’t mean that I can’t feel anything for someone. Of course, I have gotten my heart broken so many times, reasons may vary, yet… heartbroken.

You are your own confidant and it’s normal if you get your heartbroken from time to time. Don’t ever feel you’re a loser for feeling such pain, it happens. Guarding your heart too much can even lead to more heartbreak you’re sometimes too late to know of.

5. Investing too many emotions can lead to too much pain

It’s true! Sometimes, as women, tend to be more emotional. We cry and feel so much at work and at play that we forget the most important things are. The tendency, we feel so much and by feeling so much it also gives us too much pain.

Feeling emotions can be a form of strength and also a weakness. So, use it wisely.

Author: shainnehostalero

Shainne Hostalero, MDC is a social entrepreneur (owner and founder of Happy Shift PH), a communication scholar, and a writer.

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